Without a compelling “why” we simply don’t make the lifestyle changes necessary to accomplish hard things.
Your “why” is kind of like a goal. But, the way most of us think about goals is usually as a measurable physical outcome – like losing 15 lbs. or recovering a diastasis recti (DR). Your “why” is the deeper reason why you want to accomplish that physical goal.
The way I describe finding your why is a bit like talking to a 5-year-old. Grab a pen and paper. First, write down your goal. Then ask yourself the question, “But why? Why do I want to accomplish that?” and write down the answer to that. And then ask again. And again. Continue until you get to a reason that’s so compelling you’re willing to actually make sacrifices to accomplish it. For many of my clients it comes down to pain relief/quality of life or self-confidence/self-worth.
Finding your why is important for a couple reasons. First, it helps get you motivated when you just don’t feel like working toward that goal. Second, it helps you prioritize and put into perspective the wide array of competing goals you may have for your life.
Because here’s the truth: Accomplishing any BIG, HARD goal is going to take major lifestyle changes, including committing both time and money toward your goal. When you can look at your why honestly, you can be real with yourself about the time and money you’re actually willing to commit. For some people, it’s a lot. For other, not so much.
I don’t think there should be any shame around actively choosing to de-prioritize fitness or other wellness goals – only you can decide what’s right for yourself and your family. Where I think this gets tricky is when people say they don’t have the time or the money, yet they’re willing to mindlessly fetter away hours on social media or $5 a day on Starbucks. I can’t tell you what your priorities should be, but you need to tell yourself.
If you’re looking for help figuring out your why, book a time with me for a wellness consult.